Weirdness...
Sep. 13th, 2004 04:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
athenaltenaWell, that dream where I asked my friend if she believed me when I sprouted wings has come true, basically. She has always been somewhat critical of my opinions, about reincarnation, the world, and my own sexuality. The last one is what bugs me. I mean, what does she know about my sexulity? She may be wondering herself, but that gives her no right to trash my judgement about something personal to me! It's so annoying, her rational for doubting me was: "You're just saying that because James (my ex and now her squeeze) was bad to you!" Grrr...
First off, this isn't a recent thing. Or even something from this decade. The fact is, my mother even knew when I was small that this was a possibility. I have a "clarity of gaze" that many gays she knows have. I've always like girls, but boys too as friends. I like physical contact with both genders just... more so from girls in... that way. (Hum-hum) And it's probably genetic, I've had gay women on both sides of the family. She also keeps trying to tell me that my reincarnation ideas are wrong, saying, "But you're (or was at this time) only 14! How can you remember all of this stuff?"
Look, I don't know the meaning of life, but I do know what it feels like to have wires cut into you when you're being tortured. How the hell would I know that? And how would I know what... happens between guys who are more than friends.
First off, this isn't a recent thing. Or even something from this decade. The fact is, my mother even knew when I was small that this was a possibility. I have a "clarity of gaze" that many gays she knows have. I've always like girls, but boys too as friends. I like physical contact with both genders just... more so from girls in... that way. (Hum-hum) And it's probably genetic, I've had gay women on both sides of the family. She also keeps trying to tell me that my reincarnation ideas are wrong, saying, "But you're (or was at this time) only 14! How can you remember all of this stuff?"
Look, I don't know the meaning of life, but I do know what it feels like to have wires cut into you when you're being tortured. How the hell would I know that? And how would I know what... happens between guys who are more than friends.
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Well, that dream where I asked my friend if she believed me when I sprouted wings has come true, basically. She has always been somewhat critical of my opinions, about reincarnation, the world, and my own sexuality. The last one is what bugs me. I mean, what does <i>she</i> know about my sexulity? She may be wondering herself, but that gives her no right to trash <i>my</i> judgement about something personal to me! It's so annoying, her rational for doubting me was: "You're just saying that because James (my ex and now her squeeze) was bad to you!" Grrr...
First off, this isn't a recent thing. Or even something from this decade. The fact is, my mother even knew when I was small that this was a possibility. I have a "clarity of gaze" that many gays she knows have. I've always like girls, but boys too as friends. I like physical contact with both genders just... more so from girls in... that way. (Hum-hum) And it's probably genetic, I've had gay women on both sides of the family. She also keeps trying to tell me that my reincarnation ideas are wrong, saying, "But you're (or was at this time) only 14! How can you remember all of this stuff?"
Look, I don't know the meaning of life, but I do know what it feels like to have wires cut into you when you're being tortured. How the hell would I know that? And how would I know what... happens between guys who are more than friends. <___< >___> Right. Besides, I know I'm not 100% right about everything, no one is, but really, if you were god (or the universe, or whatever) would you <i>really</i> want to make a new soul everytime someone was born? ^ ^ She's allowed her own opinions, but she <i>doesn't</i> have the right to tell me mine are full of it.
First off, this isn't a recent thing. Or even something from this decade. The fact is, my mother even knew when I was small that this was a possibility. I have a "clarity of gaze" that many gays she knows have. I've always like girls, but boys too as friends. I like physical contact with both genders just... more so from girls in... that way. (Hum-hum) And it's probably genetic, I've had gay women on both sides of the family. She also keeps trying to tell me that my reincarnation ideas are wrong, saying, "But you're (or was at this time) only 14! How can you remember all of this stuff?"
Look, I don't know the meaning of life, but I do know what it feels like to have wires cut into you when you're being tortured. How the hell would I know that? And how would I know what... happens between guys who are more than friends. <___< >___> Right. Besides, I know I'm not 100% right about everything, no one is, but really, if you were god (or the universe, or whatever) would you <i>really</i> want to make a new soul everytime someone was born? ^ ^ She's allowed her own opinions, but she <i>doesn't</i> have the right to tell me mine are full of it.
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no subject
Date: 2004-09-13 06:54 pm (UTC)just an interesting idea, do you think you prefer girls because you were male in the past? in my case, i'm bisexual, and i think it might link back, at least in part, to my live(s) as a guy.
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Date: 2004-09-15 05:16 pm (UTC)